Title says it all folks. I feel worthless. My fan belt on my car is old and needs replacement. Well I don't know how to do that. So I ask Chandra (who is working on a car at the moment) to teach me. She jokingly posts a comment about the irony in a girl telling a guy how to fix his car. I laugh it off and jokingly defend myself by saying that I know computers not cars, and that this is the twenty-first century and that is a stereotype. Then a bunch of her macho marine friends start getting on my case about how I should still know basics about it. I can't help that I don't know. Her agreeing with them doesn't help. So not only do I look like a loser in front of Chandra, but I've come to the realization that as long as there are macho guys out there who know all the stereotypical guy stuff, no girl, especially Chandra, will never want to be with a guy like me. I just feel so worthless. I can't even talk to anyone about it, because it wouldn't help my case. Complaining to someone about it would only weaken my case. A 'real' man wouldn't let something like this bother him. They're fight anyway. I should know this stuff, but I don't and now it's too late to learn and impress Chandra. So fuck you, fuck them, and fuck me. I'm a good for nothing piece of shit who can't even succeed in his only endeavor in this stage in his life. I can't help it that I'm not masculine and because of that, no girl will ever choose me over a guy who is. Fuck life.
~Inddy
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